My Explanation

Posted by @ewsbdi

Thanks for explaining your side of the story. Allow me to share mine.

I was surprised you removed your pinned altogether; because I thought you could have just changed the content to avoid making a new pinned. That said, I hope it's clear that I never insinuated, stated, or wanted you to delete it.

Let's break it down a little so you'll understand where I'm coming from, shall we? I'll refer to what you wrote in your carrd, because mine is indeed a bit of a doozy to read because they're long.

1) First part
Yours: "I just aim to use RP as a getaway... don't expect a swift reply from me"
Mine: "I intend on taking RP only as an escape from real-life businesses, therefore, I will not be engaging in any form of romantic interactions..."
I first wrote this on March 2023 (proof below, you can check it yourself on Wayback Machine if you search my carrd URL), so reading through your carrd gave me a sense of nostalgia because I was familiar with the pattern, [Reason] + [Condition]. I thought, okay, fair; this applies to everyone. However, the lower I go, the more I notice similarities in the pattern.

2) Second part
Yours: "As I interpret on the short list above, ..." + no actual list
Mine: "As presented on the short list above, ..." + with an actual list.
My suspicions grew. The more I read yours, the more I had my eyes squinted because I was already not liking where it was leading me to. Interestingly, my girlfriend was the first one to notice this. I didn't even notice that you failed to change that out, or include any list to support your writing until she pointed that out.

3) Third part
Yours: "...(which usually take so much energy to scroll and reply to everything)..."
Mine: "...(which usually take so much effort to scroll and reply to already)..."
That was a little too similar for it to be coincidences. If you paraphrased it, as you stated earlier, I'm afraid it's not enough. At the moment I read this part of your carrd, I was already convinced you must have taken everything. My initial thought was, "so he took it and watered it down...? without even telling me? Do I look mean that people are not willing to come forward and ask me for a simple favor?"

4) Fourth part
Yours: "I am flexible in terms of POVs. ..."
Mine: "I am flexible in terms of POVs. ..."
It was when reading this part where I already stopped trying to convince myself you weren't straight up taking what I already wrote.

5) Fifth part
Yours: "If we have a lot of conflicts... upsets you... I'd never want to cause harm to a friend."
Mine: "If we happen to bicker a lot... hurts you... I wouldn't want to hurt a friend.
I don't think I need to elaborate further here after going through point 1-4.

Now, after seeing them placed side by side, do you notice how similar they are even after you put them through Chatgpt? With black written on white like this, please try to place yourself in the position of someone who's trying to set up rules for himself so he doesn't mess up, because he knows if he doesn't put them in writing, he will make excuses for himself and potentially hurt someone because they have no idea what they're getting themselves into by interacting with me. That someone is me.
I wrote the first part to warn anyone who was trying to get close to me that I was in a complicated stage of my life and I would like to be approached with no expectations to be romantic. Things are different now, YES, and I am happy now, YES, but that person in March didn't know this. I wrote that to keep everyone at an arm's length; and in a way, to stop myself from getting swayed by how nice it is to love and be loved. I wasn't in a good state, that's why I wrote it.

Second part, I refuse to be out of character with how I roleplay; and this usually happens when I speak in other languages that isn't English or Korean, because they're not my mother language. I am strict about this because despite speaking the language, I choose not to use it. This makes me strict about which group DMs I include myself in because a lot of them turn OOC and toxic real fast if they allow my mother language to be used, I even had a nightmarish experience because of it. That's why you'll never see me talk in other languages aside from those two in RP.

Third to fifth part aren't really personal to me, but I still wrote them and be very specific about what I meant. The third part is because I know I am a terrible texter. Despite having it written there, there was this one time I argued with my bestfriend because she thought I was doing it on purpose and that she wants me to reply faster. Fifth part? It was also because I bickered a lot. I hurt a friend because of that and she came forward to me, which isn't always what people would do. But I want other people to come to me when they think I hurt them so I can be held accountable and not mistakenly repeat it again.

This is getting long, I know. But I feel like I have to explain because I'm not mad that you took references to mine; but I'm mad that you rephrased them in a way that didn't show me that you tried. From one writer to another, from someone who likes literary to another; to me, you took them like they're a template you can mindlessly customize, when I took the time of my day to let everyone know how I function so they don't get hurt when I don't do things a certain way they're used to. I was walking on egg shells trying not to cross anybody's boundaries while writing them that's why they're incredibly long, so please understand why I seemed upset.

Also, please also refrain from sharing this to people with a twisted truth. I was never mad that you used "the same name", although the carrd URL you have right now used to be mine for a good few months before I changed it back into rowooner. Why? Because first; My name here is Aden Cyprus. Second; Marcellino is quite literally Rowoon's baptismal name. It's ridiculous to be mad over something as silly as that, of course you can use it however you want for your own writing purposes.

I wasn't "talking ill" about you, I was being very vague with who I meant on my tweets and only told my girlfriend about the details. I don't feel like I have to prove anything to you, but if you want me to screenshot my DMs, please do let me know. I don't talk crap behind people's backs. I will talk about it in front of them, or in a place where this person can see them and realize "oh maybe that's about me" then have a change of heart or something. I really wasn't gossiping about you. I wasn't asking around for anybody to validate me and despise you.

That being said, please clear my name IF (and only IF) you have mentioned this to multiple different people who aren't involved in this. I kept your dignity to my friends by keeping you anonymous (there have been a couple of other Rowoons, believe me you won't be easily singled out), I would very much like it if you keep mine. Please tell your friends I wasn't "talking ill" about you. I wasn't mad about anything else you did other than the fact that you took what I wrote without making much changes in them diction-wise.

Last few points:
- You don't have to credit me now that I know you're indeed taking my writing as a reference. Please give it more effort when paraphrasing and make sure it fits YOU and ONLY YOU. YOUR preferences are YOUR OWN.
- If you want to use Chatgpt, based on experience of using it myself, it's best to also change the structure of the words to make it less obvious. You see how putting what I wrote on Chatgpt didn't really make a difference in terms of structure? The AI isn't smart enough yet. They can only find synonyms and replace it with words that has similar definition and context meaning.

Thank you so much for listening to me. I hope what I wrote makes everything clear to you. If you have anything you'd like to refute from what I had explained, please feel free to do so. I want us to be both in the clear after this is finished.

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